The Difficulties of Being a FOCUS Missionary

My Dear Friends,

As I reflect on my first semester as a missionary, it is with a heavy heart that I consider the faults, with rejoicing that I consider next semester's new beginning, and with deep gratitude that I remember your immense generosity.

This first semester I spent a lot of good time figuring out what it means to be a missionary in the evangelical sense (note the lower case "e"). Often I would wake up overjoyed at the prospects of the day: that it was part of the job description to pray a holy hour, go to mass, eat lunch with people, talk about Jesus, witness His saving power in people's lives, spend time with a fun team. But it also often became a job, a grind, so to speak. The strength for our apostolate must come from our relationship with God. It is at these times of fatigue that I can point to distractedness in prayer.

We began the year with strong zeal during our fall outreach. Reflecting back, besides some minor mistakes that our team made generally, for myself I see a slack in zeal as the semester proceeded from fall outreach. The boldness with which I sought students out in the beginning waned as did the semester. I ask your forgiveness and prayers for this, that I would seek Jesus more purely in the sacraments and in prayer, so that, as Fr. Keating said below, my joy would not be based on circumstance, but on the hope which I have in Christ in me, and in His Cross's salvific power. There were good shots in the arm of inspiration periodically, but it is dangerous to rely on these consolations from God. At the same time, it is just as dangerous to over-compensate, so to speak, and begin to rely too much on self. It is always God's grace that we must rely on, but grace comes in many forms. Consolation is just one of them. The great challenge for each of us is loving the Consolator, not the consolation.

When I feel convicted about some action within the apostolate, a difficulty is translating that conviction into action. It is easy for me to sit back and think, "this is the Gospel, the Good News. I need to take it to campus and boldy proclaim it, so that hearts might be revealed". But then put me in the student union in the midst of hundreds of unfamiliar students and it is quite easy to rationalize silence saying "Oh, they're just going to turn a cold shoulder on me--I need to begin a relationship first, which is far too long a process, no one would be interested". Yet that's exactly what we're here for. Certainly there have been the successes, and I can only trust that God will put before me those with whom He has ordained I begin a relationship, but there is the danger that He presents His will to me and I deny it out of passivity and cowardice. Pray for me in this, that I would be blessed with a boldness and zeal for the proclamation of the Kingdom, a zeal for souls that shows forth the love of Jesus, the Incarnate Word made flesh to demonstrate to the world how to love--love no matter what! subject to death, even death on a cross! And I pray for each of you, that in your life you may have this zeal and love as well. Peace be with you in this Third Week of Advent, Gaudete! "Rejoice always!" 1 Thess 5:16

FINALS WEEK!

This week our students are busy at work, studying for finals and pulling projects together. The Catholic Student Center has turned into a study hall, with an agreed-upon silence in most of the rooms. We claimed one room, however, for snacking, unwinding, blowing off steam, etc. The students moved the ping pong table in there, brought video games, and we've held a movie series a few nights this week. It's a great time for us to support the students and encourage them as they study, but also be available for those who are in between finals, or finished, with whom we go out to eat, watch movies, and chat.

I've been trying to get together with what's called my "discipleship chain". This consists of John, my disciple, along with Nick and Vince, his disciples. It's good to get all of us together so that there is solidarity in the movement and encouragement from a greater perspective. By living life together, we grow in fraternity while at the same time witnessing to God's love to each other. I had the guys over for dinner this past Monday, I made my sister's delicious Thai Chicken Stew. It won many compliments, I recommend it. After dinner we watched Gladiator together.

Tuesday and Wednesday our FOCUS team went on our mid-year retreat. We journeyed up to Emmitsburg again, to Mt. St. Mary's College. It was a great time to reflect on the semester and recast the vision for the next. We're excited for a program we're calling "Upper Room", which will be introduced for the first time here at UMD. It is an 8 week program for new FOCUS student leaders that serves 2 purposes: 1. Unity of formation (with unity in fellowship as a side-effect) 2. An opportunity for leadership development for veteran student leaders who can help lead the workshops. The workshops cover the basics of FOCUS discipleship and evangelization models, while also providing a context for us to meet regularly and build up our fraternity. Since this is the first time we're introducing the program (many other established FOCUS schools have incorporated the program already) we're asking that all our student leaders participate. In the future it will be only for disciples who are new that year and have not started leading a bible study. Want the numbers from this year?

We started with 11 disciples at the beginning of this year. The tough news first: we lost 2 of them. The good news: we gained 7. Please pray for our continued zeal for souls as we transition into our second semester.

Pray for UNL

On Friday this week the women's side of the FOCUS team at the University of Nebraska was in a terrible car accident. 2 of the girls have been released from the hospital, but last we heard, 3 were still in pretty bad shape. One, Ashley Haas, has suffered major head injuries and she is still in critical condition as of this morning. Please keep them in your prayers. The story link is below.

http://www.ketv.com/news/18266526/detail.html

Second Week of Advent

Great news! Yesterday Vince officially said "yes" to discipleship with John. So that side of my "discipleship chain" is "spiritually multiplying" (sorry for all the FOCUSspeak).

As the semester winds down, I'd like to leave you all with a few reflections from a lecture by Fr. Michael Keating, given at FOCUS summer training, that have struck me. They may also have particular weight during this Advent season."Our joy must not come from circumstances." It is so difficult in any type of work to follow the commandment St. Paul gives us in 1 Thess. 5:16: "Rejoice always". But Fr. Keating's words here are magnificent. If we're allowing our surroundings to determine our attitude, what reason have we to be joyful? Surely we can come up with some, but ultimately this world is dying away. Our hope is in heaven, in the love of the Cross, in the glory of the Resurrection. And Christ's coming into the world at the incarnation is the beginning of that Resurrection event.

Our job as evangelists is to reveal hearts. As Jesus challenges the rich man in Luke 10, we are not to water down the message so that we can "people heaven". The rich man is told to sell his belongings and follow Jesus. He walks away sad. Again in John 6, Jesus declares that He is the "bread come down from heaven", and "whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life". When the disciples doubt and "returned to their former way of life", Jesus did not call them back and say, "wait, you're right, that was a pretty weird way of saying it, what I really meant was..." No, He revealed their hearts, both to themselves and to His Father in Heaven.

This Advent, let us not be afraid to call each other to a greater love of Jesus, the Incarnate Word. Let us dare to celebrate Christmas, not during Advent, but during Christmas. The Church gives us 8 days to rejoice. Christmas does not end on December 25th, but begins. How will you celebrate the octave?

FROM THE CAMPUS

One could say it was recruitment week around here. Last Saturday I went up to Mount St. Mary's College in Emmitsburg to help the FOCUS team up there with their recruitment event. And we held ours on Tuesday this week. They both went very well.

Our lovely team director, Helen Almeter, gave us the day off on Mary's Immaculate Conception, and we went to our National Shrine, whose patronage (yes, our national patronage) is The Immaculate Conception! Dan Murphy, a young man from my Bible study, went with us (most students are currently swamped with work before finals) and we met FOCUS teams from George Mason and University of Pittsburg there. It was an incredibly beautiful mass, again celebrated by our papal nuncio Archbishop Pietro Sambi (I'm growing quite fond of the ol' guy). We were again on EWTN, and the choirs brought Raul and I to tears. We all went out for lunch afterward at the Capitol City Brewing Co. in downtown D.C.

I'm just holding my last Bible studies of the semester, and next week we'll spend time encouraging students as they study and take finals. We set up the Catholic Students Center mostly for quiet study, but one room will be the designated blow-off-your-steam room complete with snacks, movies, nintendo, etc.

Raul is getting very excited about the feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe, to be celebrated this Friday. I think he's planning on taking me to a mass at 7pm tomorrow night, then to a vigil at 2 in the morning. He's pumped! I hope you all celebrate this patronage of the Americas by eating some tasty Mexican food!

May God bless you in this Second week of Advent!

Click here for FOCUS Promo Video

This will take you to the FOCUS website. The top video is the Recruitment video. The others are great too!

Leadership Summit 2009 and Update on the Mission

Projects!

Every other year FOCUS hosts a National Conference, last year it took place in Grapevine Texas. But what happens in the off years?

They are called Local Leadership Summits and involve coordination of FOCUS teams in close proximity to each other putting together a mini conference for their student leaders. The theme for the January 2009 Summit is "Leave the 99". UMD will be putting ours on with the Naval Academy and George Mason University. We all have committees that we're working on, mine being the program committee. So I've been making calls and sending emails trying to book speakers and music for the weekend. We've also been working on a schedule and invitations to priests and chaplains. So far for our Summit we have booked Sister Mary Gabriel from the Sisters of Life in New York, Jeremy Rivera from FOCUS National (to speak on evangelization), and Jeff Ossinger for music (a former FOCUS missionary who now works at Catholic University).

Update

John Junghans, my disciple, will be asking Vince Bury into discipleship this Friday. Please pray for both of them, that Vince responds in the way that God prompts his heart, and that John has the courage to challenge Vince in a loving and brotherly way. Here's a bad picture of Vince and I at a UMD soccer game earlier in the year.

In Other News

FOCUS UMD will be hosting its annual recruitment event next Tuesday. We're calling it "Go therefore...A Closer Look at FOCUS as a Post-Collegiate Opportunity". Please keep this event in your prayers also, it is important for the development of FOCUS Nationally for us to invite faithful young people from our community to give of themselves alongside us. I've also been invited to speak at a similar event at Mount St. Mary's this Saturday night. You can pray that God is with me and uses my words.

Raul and I have begun watching the HBO series Band of Brothers with the men at the Catholic Student Center. The series provides excellent teaching points on how to build virtue and fraternity. We're watching the second episode this Sunday night.

Happy Advent!

Hello my friends and family!

I hope your Thanksgiving holiday was full of pumpkin pie and love. I journeyed south to Dearing, GA with my team director, Helen. The fabled hospitality of the Almeters did not disappoint (though I still missed home).

I am always very excited about Advent. I think it is my favorite liturgical season. Keeping vigil excites me. Watching and waiting for Jesus; it increases the desire to go to heaven in my heart. I pray for similar aspirations for you all! I want to write here again some of the words of Mark's gospel we heard at the first Sunday of Advent:

"But of that day or that hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father. Take heed, watch and pray; for ou do not know when the time will come...And what I say to you I say to all: Watch." Mark 13:32-33, 37

Wild horses, long walks on the beach, with MEN

Click the title to go to catholicmountain.com, a website for Catholic men.


These are old photos from when I took a few guys to Assateague Island for camping. Wild horses roamed the island!

What a great trip this was! It is my hope to be able to do more camping, and perhaps snowshoeing with guys this year. There've been a couple guys who have mentioned they'd like to get out into the wilderness. So pray for me that these hopes would become reality and I'd be able to share adventures with the men that I work with. Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati became the patron of my ministry to men, so I'm asking for his prayers especially for the manifestation of fruitful fraternity. In honor of Pier Giorgio I dressed up like him for Halloween. Alas, I have not one single photo, but I wore hiking shorts with long wool socks underneath hiking boots. I wore a flanel shirt, put my daypack on and a pipe in my mouth. It wasn't that different from my normal attire...Let's just say I miss the mountains a bit. I'm praying for you all!

For your enjoyment:

Pied Beauty Gerard Manley Hopkings
Glory be to God for dappled things--
For skies of couple-colour as a brinded cow;
For rose-moles all in stipple upon trout that swim;
Fresh-firecoal chestnut-falls; finches' wings;
Landscape plotted and pieced--fold, fallow and
plough;
And all trades, their gear and tackle and trim.

All things counter, original, spare, strange;
Whatever is fickle, freckled (who knows how?)
With swift, slow; sweet, sour; adazzle, dim;
He fathers-forth whose beauty is past change;
Praise him.

BODY (of Christ) BUILDING

I want to share with you all this morning about an aspect of our ministry that has really been doing well. About 2 weeks into the semester, one of our students expressed a desire to go to the gym more often. For some reason, it was proposed that we meet early in the morning, so no one had anything going on, to begin our day together training our bodies. It began with myself, Raul, and one of Raul's disciples, Tony. We immediately recognized that it could become a great tool to connect with guys.

A brief word: our one on one discipleships are good, but sometimes for men it is difficult to just sit down face to face and talk about our spiritual lives. FOCUS and other men's ministries have discovered that it is necessary for men to sometimes do things shoulder to shoulder, as men going to battle. Sports, or working out together is a great vehicle for this.

We've been inviting more young men to commit to the gym with us, 7:30am Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. There are now 5 of us who are there pretty much every time, then about 5 others who are there every so often. We meet outside the gym and pray together offering our lifts for specific intentions. Then as we lift we spot each other, holding one another accountable to the work we've dedicated ourselves to and supporting each other through encouragement. Disciplining ourselves alongside these men, Raul and I have built up great relationships with them. One of the guys, a sophomore named Vince, has impressed me with his drive and response to challenge. He is in Bible study with John Junghans, my disciple. Because of my relationship built up through working out with Vince, I've noticed his potential for greatness. John and I have been talking about inviting him into discipleship, to complete John's quota of 2 disciples: I disciple John, and he disciples a guy named Nick, and potentially Vince, thus spiritually multiplying.

I was excited yesterday when John (who has been immovable when I try to get him to wake up for workout) saw a great opportunity to invest in Vince by coming to morning workouts. So this Friday John has decided to sacrifice his morning of sleep to come lift, out of love for Vince. He'll be learning discipline by training his own body, but will also be communicating discipleship through his loving sacrifice for Vince's relationship with Jesus.

Another great result of this activity is our visibility to the greater community. The people who work out early are dedicated, usually there very regularly. We've gotten to know several of these people, including the students who work in the rec center. We are able to chat with all these people, and witness to Christ in our lives by our joyful and motivated attitudes. There are a few with whom we've connected well. Andrew and Camillo are grad students who are Catholic and sometimes, if we get to the gym at the same time as us, will pray with us before workout. A good looking, buff stud named Kevin we also found out is Catholic, and we've been inviting him to lots of activities. Now we see him at mass and our Wednesday night dinners alot! It's cool how working out has given us these opportunities to reach out.

In honor of a faithful member of my support team, we've adopted this moto: 1 Cor 6:19: "Don't you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit?"...Tone your temple!

Important Update, Prayers needed

Dear Friends and Family,
A situation in the mission has been bubbling for a couple weeks, and I now would like to ask you all for strong prayers. I mentioned in my newsletter that I have 2 disciples (students I'm leading in one on one mentorship). One of them, Kevin, has been struggling with this commitment. He is a very busy psychology student, but is also somewhat of an unlikely leader within the community. He began discipleship last year, being asked into it and led by one of our student leaders who left for seminary this fall. Thus I "inherited" him, as we say in FOCUSspeak. Sometimes these inherited discipleships go well, but usually they are quite difficult because the relationship, which our ministry depends on, changes for the one being discipled. Kevin is a sophomore, and I have had a difficult time establishing a relationship with him. Part is my own imperfections, for which I implore your prayers and God's Providence. But also, it is simply hard to call leadership out of a person if they are naturally a bit disinclined.

Kevin has had a hard time with tougher class load this year, and has not been able to be present at many of the greater community's events. He also did not respond to many of my challenges to him to step up in leadership of the younger guys. He officially excused himself from discipleship a week ago. Rather than simply let him slide, I have been challenged to invest in him all the more, even though he is out of discipleship. This is a great opportunity for me to love--to learn to love. Kevin remains in Bible study, so he is still a student in our program, for whom we are here serving. I ask that you all pray God gives me the gift of courage and charity to reach out to Kevin in creative ways, considering his time constraints.

Also, pray for the fulfillment of spiritual multiplication in our entire ministry, as we seek new students to step into leadership from our Bible studies.

Thank you all so much for your support and prayers, for you fidelity to God in your own particular vocations of husband, wife, priest, father, mother, businessman and woman, musician, doctor, engineer, contractor, and lawyer. God bless!

Archbishop speaks to UMD men

Yesterday at our monthly "Vianney Dinner" at the Catholic Student Center, his excellency Archbishop Donald Wuerl (of D.C.) came and spoke to young men discerning vocations. One thing he told us a little about was his very recent involvement with the Synod on the Word. 264 bishops gathered in Rome over the past month to discuss the Word. He had just arrived back, and was eager to share some of his experience with us. In his grandfatherly way he recounted with delight that the Word not only refers to Scripture but much more. The Word is the Son, second person in the Trinity. It is God's image of Himself. It is the actual words Jesus used while on earth. God became man and used our own language to speak with us. It is indeed Scripture, but it is also, as pondered by the Metropolitan of Constantinople at the Synod, God speaking to us through everything we encounter in our daily lives. This was one of the encounters with God that I personally discovered on my walk with the contemplative Community of the Beatitudes in Africa. God communicates with us constantly. He uses everything. It is only our business and distractedness that prevents our listening. If we but took time to consider our surroundings, we would hear God's voice, His Word, speaking through it all. This flower, that co-worker, my car that uses too much gas, a plain table.
The Archbishop remarked on Lectio Divina, or Holy Reading, an ancient method of prayer with the Scriptures. Faithful of all walks of life are taking this up as a way to pray to God through His Word.

Let us take time to ponder God's majesty and love through the small things, considering His Word to us in our everyday life. I pray He converts your heart more and more that you fall deeply in love with Him. Peace be with you!

All Saints Day with Apostolic Nuncio Archbishop Pietro Sambi

This weekend for the Solemnity of All Saints, I went with a few students to our National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception in Washington, D.C. It was a special occasion for the feast, but also because our Apostolic Nuncio, Archbishop Pietro Sambi, celebrated mass. It was a beautiful liturgy with fantastic choral arrangements and organ music. Archbishop Sambi delivered an insightful and animated homily about our communion within the Communion of Saints. He reflected upon the many instances in the mass when we ask their intercession. Thus the priest prays, "God, by the merit of their prayers and intercession may we gain your constant help and protection".

I must say it is an incredible gift to have fabulous places like the National Shrine to take students to. We met at the Catholic Student Center in College Park and drove the 15 minutes down Michigan Avenue to the Shrine for a holy hour before mass (which also got us great seats!), and then some time afterward for fellowship.

And on this memorial of All Souls, may God protect all your loved ones who have died in Christ, may they by His Passion and Cross come to their reward in Heaven.

A Word of Welcome

To all those who have recently received the link to this page through a mailing this week, welcome!

I hope you will find this informative, and do not hesitate to refer friends to the blog. Please see the very first post at the bottom called "Genesis" for a more formal word on the initiation of the page.

Regional Gathering Emmitsburg, MD

This weekend FOCUS missionaries from the Eastern Region (Navy, Maryland, George Mason, Belmont Abbey, Vanderbilt, North Florida, Vermont, Ramapo, Seton Hall, Pitt, Temple, and Mount St. Mary's) gathered for a time of fellowship and rejuvenation in Emmitsburg, MA in upper Maryland. In addition to a great time with my brothers and sisters, I had the privilege of visiting Gettysburg, PA. The Gettysburg Foundation had recently redone its museum, and it was certainly a treat. It's winding halls wove me through the Civil War's intricate yet brutal history. Through a great combination of artifacts, primary documents and quotes, and multimedia education, I was engrossed in the story as it narrated the events leading up to the historic battle that shaped so much of our history.

The personal accounts, the various articles like belt-buckles, muskets, bayonets, uniforms, letters, journals, and knapsacks impressed me deeply. And it was not without sadness that I reflected on our nation that stands still so divided on human rights, more than 150 years after so many suffered and shed their blood for strikingly similar reasons. One side fought obstinately for the repression and brutal subjugation of an entire race of human beings. The other struggled for liberty and justice for all human life. Some problems continue, even in our "modern, enlightened" age to plague our society. An interesting fact (pace the democratic party), did you know the republican party was formed specifically during this time of civil unrest in the mid 1800s to take the platform against slavery, arguing that all men are created free?

First Timers' Retreat

The Catholic Student Center at the University of Maryland holds a "first-timers' " retreat every fall. There is a group of students who leads it, and we as FOCUS missionaries assist them in any way they need. A crucial way in which we contribute is to engage the retreaters in conversation, to make them feel welcomed and loved and to simply participate in an eager and loving way. I felt that this description of our duties was a bit ambiguous, but it turned out to be a great thing that we went. Now, back on campus, we see the students who retreated, they know us and it is very easy for us to speak with them and invite them to join in our events and activities. Many of these students are also eager to join our Bible studies and become more involved.

Genesis

I, Teddy, called by the will of God to be a FOCUS missionary and disciple of Jesus Christ, to my family, friends, a specially my Mission Partners that are in Boulder, Denver, Louisville, Golden, Windsor, Greeley, Commerce City, Arvada, Longmont, Broomfield, Westminster, Lafayette, Erie, and Brighton in Colorado, along with Charlotte in North Carolina, Swanton in Ohio, Santa Fe and Albuquerque in New Mexico, Muncie in Indiana, and Surrey in the United Kingdom; to these sanctified in Christ Jesus, called to be saints together with all those who in every place call on the name of our Lord Jesus Christ:
Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ!

I've started this journal to help communicate my joys and sorrows, successes and struggles in my life as a missionary to college students. I hope to make you all more a part of my mission by praying for you as you read and post comments in this space, and also to ask you to pray for me and those I minister to.

I bless the Lord for his abundant Providence, in sending me all of you, my dear friends and family, to support His work that He has called me to do. Your enthusiasm for the mission encourages me, helps me to lift my head in the morning and walk the rows in the Lord's vineyard day by day. Your incredible generosity converts my heart as God demonstrates to me His plentiful love. I hope the stories and thoughts of this journal will bring you much joy, as it does for me in its reporting.

God's blessings be with you, and especially the prayers of St. Hedwig and St. Margaret Mary Alacoque.